I am a part of all that I have met.

Fri, 18 Dec 2009 03:01:49 GMT

It's sad that the people you love most will also be the ones to hurt you the most. They will almost always do something that you never anticipated. And y'know what? That's exactly why I build walls. David and I were talking about this just the other day.

I only respect (most) people to a certain degree, because odds are, they aren't doing much better. The reason for this is that when the shit hits the fan, I'll feel better about the situation knowing that I was hurting them, too. It's sad, and totally wrong.. but it's my coping mechanism. All I've learned from putting my heart on the table is that self control is ALMOST non-existent in people. Anyone can justify doing something wrong if they can benefit from it, and that's why I feel like I shouldn't try harder than anyone else.

I didn't really realize that I had trust issues until now, but what else could you call that?

All I want to do is protect myself, because I'm afraid to feel like I've felt before. I don't WANT to be played. Who does? Who wants to feel like a fool? You give someone everything you possibly can, and for what? Absolutely nothing. And why shouldn't you feel like an idiot for it? People should know better. I do. I know people can only maintain a regimen for a certain period of time. All you have to do is wait to be hurt. It will come. It's like being late for work. You try every day to arrive on time, and then one day, you don't... for whatever reason. And you WILL be late again.

I know that not everyone MEANS to make these mistakes, but how do you figure out a person's motives? All we really know is what we as individuals are thinking. And all someone has to do to convince you they didn't mean to is BE convincing. It's not like that's hard to do. Everyone has done that at some point. We're all actors sometimes.

I know it's not a bullet-proof method. It's not like I'll never again get my feelings hurt, or that it won't ever backfire. But it helps me deal with things, and honestly makes it easier for me to forgive people sometimes, knowing that I'm not innocent either.

But anyway, I s'pose I'm finished with this now.

Until next time..

Not bad...

Fri, 27 Nov 2009 05:41:38 GMT

Thanksgiving went rather well this year. Last year I didn't really do anything, I'm sure Tancy cooked something, but I don't remember. Anyway.. my dad showed up. It surprised the hell out of me. I was sooo glad though.

My grandmother cooked a buttload of food, and I helped by stuffing celery sticks and buttering rolls. My mom and aunt made some things, too.

I gave Jacob my camera for a little while, and he ran around taking candids of everyone. He took a lot of good ones. I told him to tell his mom to get him a camera for Christmas. >.>

You can see the pictures he and I took here www.facebook.com/home.php and here viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm

Brenden tried deviled eggs and coconut pie. He wasn't really feeling it. But around three o'clock he was so ready for a nap.

Renton pigged out on so much stuff. He even tried to stuff an entire roll into his mouth. It was so cute. >.<

Then Heather came to see me. She got me a shirt just like hers. lol I love it.

I drank Sunkist.. twice. (go sunkist!)

and now I'm excited about Christmas. I have a tree, and lights, and am thinking about buying ONE ornament a year until I have a gorgeous tree. I still have so many gifts to get. Buying Brenden gifts months before his birthday sucked because I wanted him to play with them right away. >.< So I avoided doing that again for Christmas, and now I'm wishing I'd gone ahead and bought some stuff. But oh well. I'll pull it together somehow.

Until next time..

Is EVERYONE going to go away? Jeez...

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 00:51:34 GMT

So... in the last couple months, I've been dealing with some stuff like back-to-back. From the death of my friend Vandy, to Heather moving, to Ricky passing, to my dad getting sick, and now most recently, my friend Jake deciding we shouldn't be friends anymore.

I mean, it's okay... he said it wasn't really me. We were hardly talking anyway. But he blocked me before I even had a chance to respond. I'll be fine without being friends with him, but I didn't even get to try to change the way this happened. That frustrates the shit out of me. He didn't give me a say in the matter.

Anyway, I feel like everyone is going away, and I just have to accept things as they are, because there ISN'T a way to change them.

It's my own fault, I guess... I extended myself enough to be subject to all this crap. You'd think that, because no one in your life is in it permanently, you'd learn not to get so attached to people.

And of course I'm at a point where I can't help but feel like this isn't the end of my bad luck. I'm just waiting for the tsunami. I'm sure Chaos is just dying to wreak havoc on my tiny little life.

But anywho, I guess I should talk about something else.

Tonight Steve and I were going to Uncle Joe's because I needed cigarettes. While waiting to cross the highway, I saw in the sky two lights floating by pretty slowly. One was slightly dimmer than the other. They were unlike any flying thing I've ever seen. And after about 20 seconds, they disappeared completely. I was wishing the whole time that I had my camera. I love it when the unexplained happens.

I guess I'm bored with writing now.

Until next time..

ETA* I made a new picture album today. It's my three step guide to living a happier life. Check it out. I've got it on facebook and myspace. Here, have some links.. www.facebook.com/home.php and viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm

Follow up on a facebook status update.

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 07:22:28 GMT

Today was probably the best work day I've ever had. As soon as I got there, I pulled Sandy to the side and told her I was probably going to quit in February when my year was up. She of course asked why, and I was totally honest with her. I said, "I hate working here. But I won't just quit on you guys, and I'll have to find another job before I leave." and she said, "Well, sometimes you have to do what Lilly wants." Then she recommended some places to apply and we talked while longer. Anyway, it really meant a lot to me that she was understanding about it. Usually when I discuss things with her, she is objectionable and rude.

Then I worked with the two new girls and got to know them a little, and they seem okay.

Also before work, mom and I discussed going to Las Vegas next May for my step grandmother's birthday. I told her I wanted to go, because I could just take my vacation from McDonald's then AND it'd be right after tax time. David and I were even talking about wanting to fly together just last night. It'd be perfect. I've been wanting to take a vacation for a while now, and man, I fell in love with Las Vegas the first time I went. (Wanna go to Las Vegas in May, babe?)

Oh, and before I forget... this is the most recent picture of my new hair cut. I really love David in this one, he's got an adorable smile. I look like crap, though... but I'll post some better pictures of the cut soon.

I feel pretty great right now. Except that my hair dryer died today... so, that's something I need to replace asap. -_-

Real quick update.

Thu, 19 Nov 2009 04:24:22 GMT

David and I are nearing our ten month anniversary.

I got my hair cut off.

Brenden is doing awesome things, like saying "three" in french, and blowing kisses, and eating REALLY well, which I was concerned about for a while. Still not sleeping through the night, but we're working on it. It also seems like he's trying to say "daddy." and he's been saying "yeayea," which I probably spelled wrong... but that's grandfather in Chinese. He says "mama" too, mostly when he's upset or I'm leaving the room. God... he's coming right along. I love him. His vocabulary is actually pretty spectacular, considering at this point he's only supposed to be saying like one or two words. One mile stone after another. David and I have the cutest baby EVAR.

words.

Fri, 13 Nov 2009 07:10:23 GMT

I feel like someone punched me in the gut.
I dug a pretty deep hole for myself.
And I have a long way to go.
What should I do first?

I feel like I'm stranded...
finally waking up to the sun.
A harsh reality I can't ignore.
Where do I go from here?

Loss.

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 05:16:14 GMT

I think I've not gotten used to the time change, because I've been having a lot of trouble sleeping. My boys are sleeping, and I hope I don't wake them up.

A lot has happened to me the last couple weeks. Ricky died, and I know already told you all about that, but I still feel pretty bad. Plus, my dad was admitted into the hospital due to a cancer in his bladder. He implied that it wasn't really that serious, and that after surgery, he'd be discharged later today. Well, the surgery took a little longer than his doctor expected, and they decided to keep him over night again. And I know he's in pain. It just makes me so sad.

Life is really fragile. It's a wonder that we ever form relationships with people, because everyone goes away at some point. But I guess we are born and raised to a bond with our parents, so maybe that's just what we know to do.

Bleh.

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 07:16:23 GMT

I'm so depressed. Ricky's funeral was a total disappointment. It's not that funerals are supposed to "go well.." but this one was just awful. I felt so bad for him. I know there wasn't a lot of money put into this, because Carolyn didn't really have any disposable funds, but damn it, there wasn't even a tent to keep the rain out of Ricky's grave. I stayed until the service was over, and decided to skip the burial. It was too much.. poor Ricky.

He had a bruise on his nose, which is what I'm guessing is a result of the fall. But he did look nice, considering.. his hair was fixed like he usually wore it. He looked like such a gentleman. I miss him so much. Going to work without him there is so hard.

Adrienne is going to transfer to a new store, I think. She and Sandy were talking about it today. Everything that was in that store for me just isn't anymore. If I become a manager, I'll be miserable.. I know it. I'll be working with the only people who plan to stay there, and none of those people are ones I care to know.

I don't know..

I think I'm going to apply at wal-mart. It just seems like a cake job.

Ricky L. Vickry..

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 00:55:31 GMT

So, a good friend of mine died today...

I'm pretty sure he had a heart attack. He died in the street behind a gas station. -sigh-

I don't know what to say about it, really.. but I'm going to miss the hell out of him.

He was one of the kindest, most giving (without reservation) people I've EVER met. I only wish I'd known him longer, or at the very least, that I could have given him a proper goodbye.

The last conversation we had was about how important it was to me that he see a doctor about his chest pains... and now he's gone.. and I don't really believe it. I don't think I can yet.

R.I.P, Ricky... you're already missed. =/

Phases, stages, milestones, growth.

Fri, 09 Oct 2009 06:37:32 GMT

I feel like mom is going through something right now, and I don't know what it is. There is a possibility, though, that I am going through something, and I just think it's her. I told her tonight that I don't think she is who I thought she was anymore, that I realize now she isn't super woman. I think she misinterpreted what I was trying to say, because like I always do, I couldn't say what I was thinking. I can't form the words, I dunno. But I tried to be as honest with her as possible. I know she's wondering why I'm "so mad at her" all the time.

I'm mad at her because I don't understand, or really have any idea, what goes on in her head anymore. I don't remember her being who she is when I was a kid. And her short-comings eat me alive. Like, why do we always have to fight right before I go to work? I hate being there as is, and I can't afford to quit. And I don't think she understands that she IS NOT doing me a favor my raising my son half the time. It is a great help, and I NEED her help, but this is not the way things need to be. Not the way they're supposed to be. No one is benefiting from this convoluted situation. But like EVERYONE, I have obligations that cannot be ignored.

Did anyone notice that generally, I don't go out and party? I am NEVER not sober, and I RARELY spend the night away from Brenden. Why? Because I value my time with my boy, even if it's spent sleeping. And I'm sorry I'm not the smartest person in the world.. I didn't WANT to get up and grab a napkin to wipe the cake off of Brenden's feet. I guess I figured that since there were four other friggin' people there, with altogether, 8 free hands, they could just pass me one, and I could avoid getting covered in cake in the process.

Anyway, we apparently can't talk about it anymore because we can't reach an agreement. So instead of compromising, we'll probably just end up fighting again.. and again. -sigh-

I had to get it out.. if anything you have to say via comment or whatever involves saying something rude about my mom, just don't.

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 06:07:43 GMT

I don't like night shift. In fact, I really just hate it. Some lady ordered a double fillet meal and then refused to pull up to wait for her order. It made me SO MAD. How inconsiderate. I mean, really. There were at least four cars behind her, waiting for their food. Sadly, she is ALLOWED to do that.

Anyway, David and I have been thinking about moving... together. I really do think it's a good idea, but like everything else, it's pretty complicated. David basically just needs to stay in Huntsville.. he has plenty of obligations. And I'm too stubborn to just give in and move to Huntsville. Honestly, I just don't want to. Mom would hate it, and I'm pretty sure I would, too. I don't know Jason well enough, and he's so smart.. I wouldn't know what to say to him half the time. It'd be awkward and I would feel like an idiot for not being able to relate to him. But, David still has those obligations... so maybe I should just give in. I don't know what to do. It would be a lot easier on him.

Ultimately, I just want Brenden to be okay. I mean, damnit.. what kind of mother am I? Clearly, I am doing something wrong here. I can't embed myself into the system because I make minimum wage, and in many ways, that blows ass. I'll probably never retire. I, most likely, won't make much of myself at all. I'll be lucky to get out of the fast food industry.

And I don't know how to do this. Hi, I'm new here... to motherhood, to a relationship with a man that includes a child, hell.. I'm new to working, even. Sure, I've been working for seven months, but McDonald's was/is my first job. Anyway, I don't know how quickly we should be moving, because I've never done this before. I don't feel like we're making mistakes.. I love David. I know how I feel. And I know that I don't have time to spare, really. At the end of the day, Brenden is on the pedestal, and I'm just trying to give him what he needs. He's my son.. it's what I'm supposed to do.

No time to waste..

Thu, 24 Sep 2009 15:12:24 GMT

I'm going to be so busy for the next few weeks. Or maybe I only THINK that. I don't know, either way... I do have a lot of shit to do.

It's People Week at McDonald's, so I'm going to make cupcakes to take to work today, then Heather wants me to go to some beach in Florence with her. After that, tomorrow is armband night at the fair, and Adrienne and Heather want me to go, and I want to go, too.. but knowing I have so much to do makes it hard to look forward to it.

Brenden's birthday is about two weeks away, which means I have days to finish his room, and organize everything for his birthday party. Then there is Halloween, and you bet your ass I'm taking Brenden trick-or-treating. :) I'm so looking forward to it. He's going to be a skeleton. I bought him a neat outfit a few weeks ago that glows in the dark, it's so cool. He's going to look adorable.

Speaking of Brenden, that boy has grown so much in the last few weeks. He's SPEAKING. That's right, my little tike is saying words. He says "Uh-oh" and "Mama" and "Ow." And we're currently working on "Wow." He gives high fives, he "walks".. (almost) He helps us dress him, he's just so fun.

David and I unknowingly celebrated our 8 month anniversary yesterday. I didn't notice until today that it was yesterday, but it still makes me happy that we were together for it... even if we didn't know.

Well, this post is done for. I have to go bake the cupcakes now.

Writer's Block: Improving the Way We Eat

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 18:13:58 GMT

How could the way we eat improve in the future?

Presented by Intel, Sponsors of Tomorrow.

View 257 Answers

I don't know of many people who are improving the way they eat. What I believe will happen is, everyone will continue to live off of fast food, die younger, and solve this over-population problem we're having.

The great mystery..

Thu, 17 Sep 2009 15:45:27 GMT

Why do men disrespect the woman they love most when she isn't around?

Sadly, I've delt with this a million times in the past, and will face it again. Worse than that, it makes me wonder why I should bother "being the better person."

I guess it's not that big of an issue, but it seriously drives me nuts. Why? Because if I love someone, the thing that hurts most is knowing that his friends probably know more about me than I know they do (and it can't be all good,) but also that his friends know more about him than I do, and they know about the disrespectful shit I mentioned earlier, so I get to feel like an absolute moron if I ever find out about any of it.

and that isn't fair.

Guys are fucking dirty sometimes.

I'm ready to go back.. take me to the time capsule.

Sat, 05 Sep 2009 03:22:40 GMT

If I had really realized that I only had 18 years to be a kid, and 60+ years of adulthood to look forward to, I'd have savored those days. Really. I like being able to call my own shots and all.. but 60 or more years of grown-up time? Spare me.

Memoriam of the last year.. [picture heavy]

Thu, 03 Sep 2009 17:00:28 GMT

For the longest time, I carried this thing inside me. It wasn't a person.. it was just this thing that kicked sometimes. The idea of a PERSON inside of me was too crazy to grasp, because I'd only ever seen pictures..

But then, on October 11th, I went into labor.. and by October 12th, 11:54 AM, I'd given birth to a human being. The little creature inside me wasn't there anymore, because it was in my arms.

Some time passed...

and my little boy began developing a personality.

and started to stand...

and sit up all by himself...

This is around the time I remembered that I felt like my child was an alien inside of me once, and how dumbfounded I was when I gave birth to a baby. MY baby. I'm having the same issue again. Only now, my baby is becoming a person... a REAL LIVE PERSON with feelings. He can eat food and laugh and play and soon, he'll be walking and speaking to me. Soon.. in 39 days to be exact, my son will be a year old. Meaning I, by law, only have 17 years left to raise him. :( And I am always going to have this problem.. when my little baby becomes a toddler, and when that toddler becomes a preteen, then a teenager, then an adult.. then a parent. Ugh. I really never thought something so small could become so much, even though it's happening every day.

I love you, Brenny.

Writer's Block: Clock Punching

Fri, 28 Aug 2009 14:43:30 GMT

What was your first job?

View 552 Answers

My first job was at McDonald's. I'm still there, too... hating it. But I've been there six months and am now a manager intern. So yay? I guess?

So, last night I realized I've sort of built up this unnecessary anxiety about getting a GED, and a license, and going to college.. and doing all the other things I really need to do. But I forgot that it wasn't impossible, and when I remembered that these are things I actually COULD do, I felt better. The level of difficulty in a situation doesn't make it impossible.. and if you have time on your side, there is no reason you shouldn't use it. That's what makes it all worth while in the end, right? TRYING?

Man...

Fri, 21 Aug 2009 18:15:46 GMT

It has been super stormy where I live lately.

Writer's Block: A Bitter Pill to Swallow?

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 15:35:10 GMT

If you could get your exercise by taking a pill, would you? Why or why not?

Presented by Intel, Sponsors of Tomorrow.

View 512 Answers

Yes. If a product like that existed, why wouldn't everyone be taking it?

I want a new life.

Wed, 12 Aug 2009 01:22:01 GMT

Read the subject title.

I love you, Mary Magdalan.

Sat, 08 Aug 2009 18:59:40 GMT

I hate shitty computers. It's not hard to have one.. all you need is someone who is computer illiterate, who can't fix the things they mess up (I'm one of those people). I'm annoyed right now because I'm burning CD's, and now that I'm playing them back, there are a lot of song blips and things from the lag.

A few weeks ago, I would have sworn I was a work addict. But now I don't think that's true. I think that really, I'm just a money/power/independence addict. I want money, and LOTS of it. I'm not gunna get it working at McDonald's, but I can't just marry a rich dude, because I want to accomplish it all on my own.

IMO, I think kids should spend their childhood doing lots of training and things. The idea isn't to raise super-intelligent robots, but I seriously think we could brighten up the latest generations by doing so. Think about it, practice will make you better at something... and why should we stop at the basics in school anyway? Why would you wait until highschool to take an art class? They should have that throughout school. Then EVERYONE could draw, almost. I mean, I seriously think I draw on a 3rd grade level or something. Maybe lower. I'm terrible at it. But drawing isn't the only thing a person could excel at through years of practice.. I played violin for eleven years, and as a result, I'm one of the only people I know who can actually play. Most people can't even read music. It's not their fault.. it's no one's fault.. but I really feel like we're limiting our intelligence by not incorporating new things into a school day. A lot of the tasks are really easy to master, too. Like, there are things that should even take a whole semester to learn. For instance, keyboarding. I took the class in highschool because it was mandatory. I learned how to type the "correct" way in like two days, and mastered it in about a week, and I've been typing this way ever since. It's like learning to ride a bike.. you never forget how and what not. And why should everyone progress at the same pace? If someone smarter and faster is being held back because the rest of the class isn't catching on as quickly, he's being deprived of bigger and better things, and probably bored to death. Why should he have to wait for them?

Anyway, I'm just saying.. the idea that kids are learning the bare minimum in school just bothers me. We could be so much better.

Making good choices = making more good choices.

Fri, 07 Aug 2009 01:06:45 GMT

I don't know what to say tonight. I think I might get fired from work, or maybe I'm just in trouble.. or nothing at all. I dunno.

This is how it happened...

Denise made me work ten hours yesterday. She didn't MEAN to, but she didn't understand that I did NOT agree to work from 6-4. Well, that made me mad, and when Adrienne got to work, I told her about it... and she lectured me about it, like any manager should, she didn't complain about it with me. Anyway, later that day, Sandy came in and gave Adrienne a write-up for discussing the "schedules" with me. O_o So when Adrienne came to work today, she told me about it. Then later on, Denise confronted me about working the ten hours, and I told her what she did, and we went about our business. Later on, I was sitting outside after work waiting for my ride. Adrienne went on break and sat outside with me, and we talked about it. As soon as she mentioned Denise's name, Denise walked outside and I'm like 95% positive she heard us. So when she got in her car to leave, she drove around the parking lot, and I'm guessing to drive-thru, to tell Sandy.

So I might be fired, because some of my managers don't care what's right and wrong, so long as they can cover their asses. (Because this isn't the first straw.. there was that thing about the "rumors". I don't think I told you guys about that... another time.)

Anyway, I hope it doesn't cost me my job, or my position in management... but if it does... it'll kind of be a god-send. I don't really want to be a manager, I'm doing it because I have to. But if I got fired, I wouldn't HAVE to take the position.

I guess that's all.
I'm gunna go.

Maybe it'll make sense...

Sat, 01 Aug 2009 03:42:07 GMT

I think that I dwell too much on situations and make things worse for myself than they have to be. Like, I'm doing a lot of things to keep my life in order, but I feel so guilty that it isn't enough. Guilt is not getting me anywhere any faster, though.. so, what's the point of tormenting myself about it? I'm trying really hard to be a normal person doing normal things, but I still feel out of place no matter where I am.

To put it sort of simply, I feel like when it comes down to it, humans are just really intelligent animals. We are instinctual, but we know better than to do some things. Pets have this knowledge, too. but it's pretty basic for them because you can teach a pet not to do things (without them being emotionally aware that they shouldn't do something), and they probably won't because they know it's generally not allowed. We aren't exactly the same, but we are seemingly pretty similar to them. Anyway, so, a lot of the time we try to do what's right.. based on morality and what we're used to and consequences. Yet somehow, while I'm trying hard not to be and do the things I shouldn't, I feel like I'm a little bit of all of those things, and I could do them if I could stand being out of the ordinary, even if it's all secretly pretty damned ordinary. I feel like everyone thinks about doing bad, sometimes terrible, things. But I also feel like what separates a good person from a bad person is whether or not they choose to act on those thoughts.

The point is, I don't feel like my feelings are conventional. That isn't necessarily what I believe, but what do I know? I can't really know at all if we are just a bunch of instinctual yet somewhat more intelligent animals. But there is so much evidence of it. And if it's true, should I feel this guilty? I'm not doing all the bad things I could do, because I know better. I just think about it sometimes.

Hm..

Back to this..

Sat, 25 Jul 2009 17:20:35 GMT

I wrote my dad an e-mail yesterday, asking for 50 dollars, because my checks have been shit as of late. Honestly, this last check, I just kind of spent too much. -shrug- Anyway, in the e-mail, I told dad I wanted to bring Brenny to see him today (Saturday). Apparently he wrote me back last night around 11:15, but I was in bed by then. So, obviously, I was surprised when he and my brother, Kyle, who has been in rehab in Huntsville for a while, showed up at MY house. Apparently they were on their way to the river, so they were coming over for a short stay. This stay lasted about ten minutes, and I'm disappointed about it.

Dad and I have always had a strained relationship. One that would take a lot more work than either of us are willing to put forth. Growing up, he wasn't a bad parent, he just wasn't a good father. I remember the few times he hit us and a lot of ridicule, but other than that, I just remember trying to find ways around him. He doesn't even know that I smoke, and I've been doing it for like six years. It's always been that way. Dad's conservative, and really set in his ways, and I am his polar opposite. But I thought that Brenden would somehow bring us closer together.. and he did briefly. But now we're back to this... this awkward relationship that we've always had. I told him about my training to become a manager, he gave me a thumbs up and told me to go to college. He's always accepted me, but never really approved. I guess that's all I want from him.

That's all I have to say today, I suppose. Later.

Biological clocks are hard to set.

Thu, 23 Jul 2009 21:42:12 GMT

Hm..

Don't really know what to say here. Management is approximately 10 hops, 23 skips, and 5 jumps away.. and I'm out of breath. -_- I know I just need to get used to waking up at the ass-crack of dawn, but right now, these new responsibilities are a real drain. I DO NOT get off of work on time, EVER. Not anymore. I'm torn. I have a choice to come into work each morning, 30 minutes or so early and perform waste inventory in the cooler, or I can wait until the end of my shift to do it. Since I'm already waking up at 4:45 AM each morning, a mere fifteen minutes after Mcdonald's opens, I've just been waiting until the end of the day. But at the end of the day, after I've been on my feet for 8 hours, kissing lots of consumer ass, I don't feel like cleaning out the cooler. So I could wake up earlier, but then EVERYONE would suffer... you know, more than they already are. Mom would have to wake up earlier, and Brenden would, too. This sucks.

I suggested to Sabrina today that she and the rest of the managers promote Tandy to Crew Trainer. Tandy is relatively new, but she's a really great employee. I like her, and I think she'll do well at McDonald's, provided she doesn't quit.

It gets weird at McDonald's sometimes. There are people who know me, that I don't know. They notice that I've changed my hair color or gotten a new cut, and it's WEIRD, because I only recognize a few of them. And I know my tag has my name on it, but I'm still not used to hearing strangers call me by name. Anyway..

Today marks the 6th month of "Lilly and David." :3 I can't believe it. So far, so good. I love him so much. We should start spending more time together in the coming weeks. :) That makes me happy, because he only left this morning, and I miss him already. I wish he was still here.

I'm gunna go, I guess.